futureproof Archives - iRespectOnline

There is so much information online for parents these days it is hard to know where to turn, it can be pretty confusing, and time consuming trying to cover it all. So many ebooks and articles and blogs on safety and apps and etiquette (we here at iRespectOnline have written many of them!).

Last year (2012), after seeing the career aspirations of one young teen smashed due to inappropriate photographs being posted online and found by a prospective employer, I knew I had to write a book to really EMPOWER parents with knowledge and to help them to understand the importance of guiding their children from the earliest ages possible. It took me just over a year to write as my father had a stroke just before I was due to finish it, but I am so pleased that it is now available and is being very well received.

Futureproof your Kids© encompasses my passion for not only educating parents in understanding the online world but of empowering our children to be the SUPERKIDS of the future online. Children who grow up respecting integrity and high values.

I never set out to write “another” guide book on privacy settings and the like as social media platforms change so often. Through collaborative efforts, I already have wonderful series of helpful tip sheets produced with my lovely colleague Mel Rom at Social Ediquette™ in Perth, WA. (We update these often to keep them on track with the latest changes).

Instead I have a produced a book from the heart, designed to help readers to really think and consider what our online interactions mean for ourselves and others, both now and in the future. The book is designed to assist parents with the issues they are really struggling with – where to begin, how to help their children, and to understand the benefits as well as be aware of safety and issues such as cyberbullying. Beyond that, this book introduces my 4 Step Reputation Framework© which I am so excited about.

This framework encompasses a set of ethics and values which our children can use throughout their lives. Introducing the values via 4 cute characters (created by my amazing illustrator Deb Parker) we meet Ruby Respect, Robert Responsibility, Rosie Resilience and Ronnie Research. These characters form an integral part of the content of my education workshops for parents and schools.

Further “superkid” superhero characters are introduced as we progress through the workshops. The values are valuable for adults to embrace also, as it is from parents and other adults that our children tend to model their early behaviours on. We need to keep checking our own “reflection” in the social media mirror!

IT IS NEVER TOO EARLY OR TOO LATE TO START LEARNING ABOUT THE ONLINE ENVIRONMENT. Whether your child is under 2 or 16 we should not allow a digital divide to develop between our children and ourselves when it comes to understanding the online environment. You need to be there, to help guide your children through the social media “playground” . Grandparents, Aunty’s, Uncle’s and neighbours too, should all understand the environment so you can work together to create a consistent approach to the use of social media where your children are concerned.

It’s not just parents and children who can benefit from my framework, I also have a “grown up” workshop version of the 4R’s Reputation Framework© for businesses who wish to embrace a more ethical, transparent and connected approach to the way they engage online with their clients, customers and prospects.

I look forward to sharing future posts with you that explore the contents of the book and perhaps engaging with you at a workshop at your school or community group soon!

Respectfully

Fiona Lucas

Author

Futureproof your kids© is currently available to Australian parents in paperback form from our website and at www.futureproofyourkids.com. Kindle/electronic formats of the book are currently under development and will be available globally in the near future. We encourage purchasing the hard copy so it can be shared around your family and always nearby for reference :-).

Enquiries for international and/or bulk orders should be made directly to the author via the contact form:

[contact-form][contact-field label=’Name’ type=’name’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’Email’ type=’email’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’Enquiry Type’ type=’radio’ options=’international enquiry,bulk order,school enquiry,workshop enquiry,keynote speaking enquiry,Other’/][contact-field label=’Comment’ type=’textarea’ required=’1’/][/contact-form]

iRespectOnline®

Your social media mirror. Have you checked your reflection lately?

As passionate as I am about raising awareness for change in the way we engage online, I had an interesting “comment debate”* on someone’s wall about taking action in the area of online safety and cyberbullying. As someone who is proactive about change and commited to bringing respect, ethics and higher values into the online environment, I was quite interested in their view that my business, my blogs, workshops and my book did not constitute action in this person’s eyes. They spoke about joining organisations to volunteer time on help lines etc as being action.

It is so vital that we do man help lines in order to address the suffering of others, and I certainly hope that the information I share and the openness of my blog and facebook pages offers value for those seeking help, along with the events and organisations that I volunteer time to. In my opinion, my positive action looks beyond helping only those who are already suffering, to include preventing it from happening to others. Therefore I truly feel that educating others, and changing mindsets is very much an action. Would you agree?

The debate however had me thinking about ways of trying to bring positivity into the space. I really hate having to have negative conversations where it feels very ‘doom and gloom’ due to the important issues of safety, because I also feel the online environment can have such a positive effect and be used in ways which are beneficial to others. Some of these benefits include the availability of information, creation of supportive community, help and support during disasters, bringing together those with shared interests, bringing education within the reach of everyone, helping isolated communities to feel more connected, assisting those with disabilities who might otherwise not engage, encouraging us to share our hopes, dream and achievements with others as a way of inspiring those around us – the list goes on. We just don’t highlight the wins enough, but we sure amplify the darker side when it happens.

Some people say to me “I don’t want to share what I had for lunch, or know what you did”, “I dont need people to know where I’ve been or what I did”.. and sure maybe you don’t, but if we go back in time, when communication wasn’t so broad, everyone in the village knew what you had for lunch, what you did, where you had been…. so to me, we have just tried to bring some of the village back, because we have all been wandering around our big lonely cities for quite some time. Just as some wanted to escape the village back in the day, we have those who want to escape back to a time when each of us had more interest in the other, because there simply was a lot less to occupy our minds. With so much now filling our heads, a bit of harmless, no-brainer, “I don’t have to analyse this” posting is quite welcome in my world! Ok some things should stay private – I don’t need to know when you shower or go to the loo (or what you look like in either of those situations) – but if you really want to share that, I would probably ask you why, but then limit the feed. After all it’s your wall, not mine and you can share what you like as long as you take responsibility for it. If you eat out somewhere nice, I am interested – I love eating out and I don’t mind the pics of your food. If you post graphic images of particular causes, that is up to you, but be sensitive to the ages of those you transact online with. Respect our youth’s right to grow up without fear in their faces every minute. Just own what you post. Seriously if you don’t like it, don’t judge it, just adjust your settings if it really bugs you. If its illegal or inappropriate, report the page or post – that’s what I do.

What about though, rather than getting up in arms about people posting pics of the cat, or their outfit, that we choose to view our online experiences with the glass half full? Embrace the simple joy and pleasure that someone is getting from sharing their new hairdo, the new garden spade or their boutique beer. Rather than be annoyed, breathe in the simplicity of their joy and happiness. You don’t have to rush out and get a spade, but hey, if you ever need one you now know which friend can help you!

Naturally there are certain pictures which shouldnt be shared – the ones your grandma would blush at – keep them private. However if you do post about your more intimate thoughts or the melt down you had – recognise that you are reaching out to your community, but also recognise that you must take responsibility for that post – and if you don’t get the response you wanted, either take it down, or learn from it. If its too personal, don’t post it – try picking up the phone and talking things over with a close friend. In the end it is your wall. Try and be understanding, don’t knock the guy who posts pictures of his new mag wheels when you have just finished posting 300 pictures of baby eating yoghurt – one is his baby the other is yours!

If you only use your social media for business, then stop and realise that platforms like facebook and blogging itself have grown as social networks and blogging is about sharing opinion, thoughts and events of the day – hundreds and thousands of global diaries being updated every minute. Logically not all content will resonnate with our own values and opinions, but if you let it wash over you, you might just find that you are learning new things. We need to keep the social in social media or we go back to square one, and I think many in the world are over the bombardment of advertising everywhere they go.

This post was inspired because I was seeking interaction on how to bring positives, love and fun into the space, to counteract some of the negativity. I was shocked to find that some people, particularly young people, just don’t know how to give a compliment or praise someone. It’s not, to coin a phrase “wanky” to tell others positive things – it’s just simply nice!

So how can we take simple postive action? Well how about joining up with our new global event? Until the end of June we challenge you to join us and to post a positive comment on someones wall, then share the comment (without the persons name) so that others can see the types of things that people appreciate in others. #LET’SSMILEONLINE is a really simple way to spread a little love. I think our kids would be more resilient and able to cope with the odd nasty comment from a bully when (1) they can recognise that the issue is with the person posting, not them (2) they see positives to counteract the negatives. It’s not rocket science, it’s not even science, it’s just something I would love your support in trying. Let’s all be online superheroes. If you see something negative, just remove it, or let us know if it’s on our event and we will remove it. No need to engage because who wants to waste energy on negativity anyway?

fiona lucas

*comment debate: my term for a lengthy thread on facebook

*illustrations from Futureproof your Kids